Romero = Riefenstahl

Now that Obama is president and human racism is over, I think we need to start workin' on the racism in other creatures. The obvious first choice would be German shephards, but I'm gonna go against the grain here and say they're probably not that big of a threat. I mean, even if some kind of "Hitler-Shephard" hypothetically rose to power in one neighborhood by barking his hateful message through the fence, he'd probably get run over by a car or eat some chocolate out of a garbage can and die before he could escape and establish any serious, viable movement with other racist dogs. But if you still wanna picture giant armies of Miniature Schnauzers marching in cute SS hats, I won't judge you.

Matter fact, let's just rule out animals, period, cuz they don't have souls. So what other creatures can we teach tolerance? My proposal...........

Zombies.

Think about it. Has anybody ever seen a zombie? No.......and yet in all the horror movies, the zombies are always either green or blue. Who the hell made that rule? One green zombie wrote a screenplay and now the rest of the zombie community gets disenfranchised? If (when) the zombies take over the world, I think we'll see that they come in all colors and disgusting shades. This is just Hollywood perpetuating yet another bullshit racist stereotype. It shouldn't matter what color the flesh-eater's flesh is colored. Somewhere along the way, we've lost sight of the fact that on the inside, all of our brains are gray. And tasty.

Speaking of green zombies, Joni Mitchell turned 65 today. I wonder how much that is in human years?

Happy Friday everyone. In the words of the great philosopher Mr. T, "Everybody gotta wear clothes, and if you don't, you'll get arrested."