My friend: "Man I can't believe Patrick Swayze is dead."
Me: "RIP to the best damn cooler in the business."
My friend: "Roadhouse! Awesome. Honestly that was the only thing I liked him in."
Me: "Wow. So you don't like your mom?"
My friend: *look of disgust and hatred*
Me: "I'm just sayin'. That's kinda messed up man. She's still your mother, no matter what she did in the past."
My friend: "You're an idiot."
Me: "You're just mad cuz Uncle Pat is gone and he never took you to the park like he promised. It's ok man, work all those emotions out, I'm here for you. This is good. This is good."
My friend: "This joke is going on way too long."
Me: "DON'T YOU THINK I'M AWARE OF THAT!"